Coronavirus and lockdown have been collapsing the marriages with 51 divorces a day in the capital. The couple, who complained of being deprived of quality time for each other before the coronavirus situation, is now tired of getting the partners all the time by them. These couples are now locking horns over negligible matters of their day-to-day life which they easily overlooked before the lockdown.
Increasing domestic violence during the lockdown is becoming apparent to everyone. In order to avoid coronavirus pandemic, people have to stay home most of the time. This sense of confinement is giving rise to bitter and sweet memories. A record number of divorces was recorded in the capital in last July at an average of 51 divorces per day in two city corporation areas.
Experts raised their concerns and said that compulsory quarantined lifestyle is mounting mental pressure and causing anxiety. Accordingly, compulsory intimacy during the Covid-19 crisis seems to be one of the main reasons behind the divorces. Other reasons behind the escalation of divorces include reluctance to mediate, lack of interest in finding an amicable solution and lack of patience.
Rifat (not real name) working in a private company had to choose the option of dissolution of marriage although he is against the concept of divorce. Rifat married Sumi (not real name) who completed post-graduation from National University one and a half years back with the consent of his parents. First few months of their married life was smooth but problems began to brew afterwards. Differences in opinion between them became worse during the lockdown when they stayed together for the whole day. At one stage, both of them opted for divorce and Sumi divorced Rifat with the consent of her family.
Even many marriages following long love affair met the same fate during the lock down. Farzana (not real name) and Faisal (not real name) married two years back after eight years of love affair. Both of them are service holders. First year of their marriage was like a dream but problems paced up from the second year. They realized their maximum intolerance towards each other while staying together during four months of lockdown. During this time flimsy indifferences turned serious as a result they decided to go for divorce in July.
Apart from Rifat and Farzana divorces are taking place frequently. As per experts the sudden changes in lifestyle raising tension and intolerance during this crisis may be one of the reasons behind the divorces. It is not clear when people will get out of this crisis. Due to uncertain future, people are losing their temper having adverse effects on the family members.
In July 2019, number of divorces registered in Dhaka South City Corporation area was 563. The figure was 545, 541, 820, 453 and 498 during each month respectively during the period of August to December. In first three months of 2020, the number of divorces recorded were 528, 452 and 492 respectively. No divorce was recorded as the court was remain closed in April. However, in May and June the divorce numbers were 113 and 441 respectively with the maximum number 878 in July.
In Dhaka North City Corporation area a total of 1514 divorces were recorded in the first six months of the current year. In January, February and March the toll of collapsed marriages were 618, 441 and 455 respectively. No divorce was recorded in April. During May, June and July the numbers of divorces recorded was 54, 632 and 654 respectively.
Clinical Psychologist of Faridpur Medical College and Hospital Md. Mahbubur Rahman termed gender discrimination as one of the reasons behind the rise in the divorce. According to him when a husband and wife stay together for a longer period of time, love and affection should increase between them instead of bitterness. But there are some issues including gender discrimination increasing bitterness.
According to Mahbubur Rahman we do not have clear concept about gender discrimination in spite of our literacy. During the lockdown women are having increased workload. Besides, both male and female are undergoing mental stresses during this period causing them to lose temper and compassion towards each other along with lacking in understanding. We are not sacrificing as far as our ego is concerned and looking for divorce in order to get rid of the problems.
Husband and wife are staying together due to lockdown. During this time differences in opinion are taking place between them for many reasons and their personal shortcomings are becoming more visible to each other. Some of them are spending more time in the social media instead of spending time between each other. In consequence, both the parties are losing respect for each other along with loss of love and affection.
Professor of Social Science of Dhaka University Shah Ehsan Habib says that husband and wife are bound to stay together and devoting each other necessary and unnecessary moments due to the unexpected situation created by Covid-19.
According to this social scientist due to multiple dimensions in a relationship trifling matters give rise to arguments and sometimes altercations when partners become available for each other. Shah Ehsan Habib considers financial pressure due to Covid-19 as one of the reasons of the divorces. He says people are not having proper incomes which have severely squeezed or sometimes halved in this crisis. Fall in the standard of life the middle class and lower class are finding it hard to acclimatize with the changing scenario. As a result, a huge difference is being created between expectation and attainment. Divorces are on the up due to the inability of acknowledging the differences.
In foreign countries people often go in an outing with family members for refreshment boarding a personal commuter amid coronavirus outbreak which is not possible in the context of Bangladesh. As a result, mental stress is created along with an increase in altercations.
He thinks urban people have their own world although family bonding between rural people is much stronger. In rural areas people are much committed as far as relationship is concerned. Due to frequent visits by relatives any chance of domestic violence is very low in the rural area. Such scenario is not visible in urban life where people live in a world of their own giving preferences to own choices causing rise in the incidents of divorce.
As a whole experts suggest lack of compassion and tendency of not compromising as reasons behind the loss of nuptial love.
aa/wi
